Several years ago, when I was just beginning to ponder the idea of working from home via the internet, I was having lots of fun listening to coaching programs meant to encourage and inspire those who wanted to work online. It was a great time of gathering inspiration and building a circle of friends.
One encounter in particular has never escaped my memory, even though it was probably 5 years ago and seemed like an insignificant conversation at the time. Today I’m running that conversation through my mind again, wondering if God is trying to tell me something.
The conversation came about as part of a group discussion after an online class about building your dream business or ministry. People were sharing what they hoped to do and we were being encouraged to step out and be extraordinary.
Honestly, it was a little bit overwhelming. So many wonderful plans and ideas being shared. So many big steps were going to be taken. The world was waiting for our gifts.
In a moment of overwhelm I typed this question:
“Is is OK for some of us to just be ordinary?”
And I got this response from the other students in the group:
“No! You are extraordinary. God created you to do wonderful things. We all need to embrace our brilliance and do amazing things for God.”
Or something like that anyway.
I know it was meant to be an encouragement.
I know that because I was made by God and given an assignment by Him that I am extraordinary. And that I can do extraordinary things. But that day I wasn’t feeling very extraordinary. I was in a season of getting almost no sleep because of a very unhappy baby. “Extraordinary” for me was any day that I did laundry AND made dinner. (Most days consisted of many hours of holding said baby. And I don’t regret a single one.)
When I was told by the group that we are all supposed to be doing something amazing I felt completely defeated. I wanted them to let me “off the hook” by telling me that what I was doing– caring for my baby and my family–was embracing my brilliance!
What I’m wondering today is this: could it be that my “extraordinary thing” that I’m supposed to do for God is not something that looks extraordinary at all but in truth looks rather ordinary?
Are some of us –perhaps most of us–called to be ordinary?
Do you ever hear women talking about their ministries? Does it seem like everyone has a ministry except you? Do you wonder if keeping up with your demanding 2 year old counts as a ministry? How are you supposed to do something amazing and wonderful for the Kingdom when you can hardly get a shower?
We can get so down on ourselves when we look around and see other women with very public ministries and here we are just living day-by-day, not doing anything particularly special. No huge ministry, not even a small ladies’ Bible class depending on our wisdom. Just an ordinary mom, wife, and homemaker. (And maybe not a great one at that at this particular moment!)
But maybe that’s what most of us are called to; being ordinary, but doing it exceptionally well. Maybe a picture of a godly woman, living in her brilliance zone would look like:
- A mom who truly interacts with her kids
- A wife who manages the stresses of her day such that she is pleasant when her husband comes home
- A friend who takes the time to cultivate true friendship and accountability
- A child of God who rests in His peace, thrives in His joy, and laughs at the days to come
I wonder how many ministries would be unnecessary if we all were just ordinary women, doing ordinary things, exceptionally well.
I admit, I’ve been one to long for something big. Something I can quantify and measure, and know that because I do that thing, I am successful.
But I’m done with that.
I’m done with trying to be amazing, trying to figure out what my grand calling and purpose is.
I’m done overlooking the extraordinary that’s found in the ordinary.
I’m ready to be quite content being the best Me I can be. Ministry or no ministry, business or no business, title or no title.
Are you ready?
I’m not advocating that we all just sit around and do nothing. I’m asking you to consider the idea that perhaps you’re already doing something extraordinary. The world–even the Christian world–just hasn’t labelled it that. And that maybe by looking for that one thing that will make you worthy, that significant contribution you can make to society and God’s Kingdom, maybe you’ll overlook the thing He called you to do.
Thank you for posting this. I am a SAHM of a two year old. I have really struggled with thoughts that what I’m doing isnt enough, but at the same time knowing in my heart that this is what I have been called to do.
Beth, I LOVE this!!! I have many of those same thoughts. I absolutely think it is okay for some of us to be ordinary. In fact, I think more of us should be ordinary. I think sometimes it’s harder to be ordinary. We want to do great things. We want to get the recognition for those great things, either from other people or just from the feel-good satisfaction of doing great things.
It is really hard to stay self-motivated to do your absolute best in the mundane things that no one but Jesus will ever see.
Thank you for sharing!
I remember when our beautiful, precious daughter Leah (now 20 going on 21) was first born. And in those first few weeks of her nursing, me changing her diapers, bathing her, trying on her pretty different pink outfits, etc., me being able to take a shower at all seemed impossible-when would I fit it in my day? Or getting dressed and putting on makeup-in those days, I wore sweat pants and my husband’s t-shirts a lot, the only thing that seemed to be able to fit as my “baby weight” was coming off so slow, even nursing. For me, taking a shower and getting through the day, fixing even one meal for my family or doing one load of laundry, was something extraordinary. Loved what you wrote about a mom who interacts with her kids or a wife being pleasant when her husband comes home. The world may overlook these things as being extraordinary, but I believe with all my heart that being a mom is the most sacred, precious job in all the world -nothing considered “worldly success” could EVER compare to it. At times I do feel that momentary doubt about not being “on the map” as you wrote – for I’m no one of great fame, wealth, or worldly success – but I am wealthy in my family and friends and most of all, in my relationship with a God who loves and forgives me – despite myself. I do believe God wants to use ordinary women in extraordinary ways, and His plans for us are often so much bigger than we can imagine. But I also believe that what we so often think of as “small” (or unimportant), He views in a MUCH different light! Thanks for this great, insightful post, Beth. Great writing.
Hi! Thank you. I love this. Our children are 18 and 22! It is hard to believe. I have been blessed to be able to be “ordinary” :). I have been trying to get a job for several years but not getting one. I have had temporary ones that were in the right time but nothing permit. I went through a phase feeling that I’m no good but I have embraced and accepted that my right place is ordinary Extraordinary! Hold, play and teach your babies. These are treasured times enjoy them and do as Mary did, ponder them in your heart.
One of my devotions this morning was this:
Zechariah 4:10 For who hath despised the day of the [h]small things? but they shall rejoice, and shall see the stone of [i]tin in the hand of Zerubbabel: [j]these seven are the eyes of the Lord, which go through the whole world.
Footnotes Zechariah 4:10 Signifying, that all were discouraged at the small and poor beginnings of the Temple.
Zechariah 4:10 Whereby he signifieth the plummet and line, that is, that Zerubbabel which represented Christ, should go forward with his building to the joy and comfort of the godly, though the world be against him, and though his for a while be discouraged, because they see not things pleasant to the eye.
Zechariah 4:10 That is, God hath seven eyes: meaning, a continual providence, so that neither Satan nor any power in the world, can go about to bring anything to pass to hinder his work
Debbie,
Thank you so much for sharing those scriptures from your devotional, they’re so fitting to this topic. I’m going to copy them into my journal!